Monday, September 27, 2010

TMI

In the past week two acquaintances have told me more than I ever wanted to know.
I stress the word, acquaintances.  Family, friends, fellow bloggers, I will listen to--whatever they want to tell me.
But ya gotta draw the line somewheres.

Scenario #1: Details regarding the disintegration of  a marriage, the infidelities on both sides, the dirty little details. 
Scenario #2:  Breast augmentation gone awry.
(What? I wanted to ask.  Are we in some kind of outtake from the Real Housewives of New Jersey?)

Now, starving reader, I have pondered the genesis of these two events.  Why?!?!?  Why?!?!
And after much contemplation I realized, because I didn't offer them any food to put in their mouths, to stop the terrible onslaught of overly personal information.

To help you avert similar disaster I recommend:
withdrawing all potent potables.
Offering food that requires concentration and attention.
Like chicken wings.
Or tostadas.
Or nachos, with a very spicy salsa.
I'm just sayin'

9 comments:

  1. Probably only slows up the onslaught.

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  2. I love this game. Peanut butter springs to mind. (Talk of innards of any sort makes me feel squeamish and bored, if one can feel both of those at the same time.)

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  3. Spicy is good. It not only slows the mouth but tends to obstruct the mind....

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  4. thanks, kiddos--AH: you sure know how to nail an emotion!

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  5. Are you not nosy like me? Even if people are spewing TMI, most of the time, I'm too curious to stuff their mouths with food--at least for the first five minutes.

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  6. Melissa: Great question. And I am VERY nosy--and usually just genuinely interested,
    but in these two event event my curiosity hit the discomfort zone--

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  7. Any meat I cook will leave you speechless and in search of water. Dry as the desert. I just don't have the gift.

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  8. sorry about the failing marriage, mom, guess it means more christmas presents for me!

    xo simone

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